Free Stepfamily Problems Essay Sample
The family in a given case study clearly experiences some difficult times and is faced with some tough decisions. The people stand at the point of creating a stepfamily, which is a big decision. All members of a future family experience some amount of natural stress and all have their worries. In this particular situation the future family is doing quite good in terms of developing their mutual relationship but there are still some questions they need to address before proceeding any further.
Jason and Rose are two adult people who want to unite their lives. However, the sensitive aspect of their situation is the presence of children from both sides. Rose has two daughters who are of young age (eight and five years) and Jason has two teenage boys. Surely, these people have worked a great deal on keeping the process of coming together natural and gradual. One can observe that both parents emphasize that they’re planning to always be there for their children and to pay proper attention to them. Jason and Rose have taken lots of precautions and adjusting steps along the way. For instance, they talked about dating with their kids to make it acceptable and natural, they have taken time to let the children get used to that idea and only after that they introduced them to each other. As some time after the initial introduction passed they arranged a family dinner and established it as a weekly family tradition. The café was chosen by all family members. So, one can notice that the parents really try to make a smooth transition for their children; and the situation seems rather positive.
However, looking at the individual family members and hearing their thoughts about the existing situation sends some alarming signals. By doing this one can notice that there is some level of miscommunication or lack of communication between the people. The little girls seem to have the least problems. They’re excited to have older brothers and the only concern for them is whether their mother will still be able to pay attention to them like she used to. Since both parents are determined to do that there should be little problem with the girls. Rose just needs to tell them explicitly about how the thing would still be largely the same. As for the teenagers, there might arise some difficulties. Overall, they are fine with having sisters and a stepmother but they have a lot of questions that need to be answered. All those areas of concern should be addresses and all questions should be given answers to. There may still be difficulty in having to share the bedroom among brothers or the bathroom with the girls. The new family night want to adopt he democratic discipline for their kids as they already use a several elements of it. They do a good job in being gradual with the process and explaining the children what’s happening. Therefore, they have to proceed with this approach and make sure that they model the desired behavior and discuss together with children how their discipline will work (Sharon, 1990). One important thing to assure them in is the fact that there will be still time and place for their “all men” trips with the father.
One of the areas to improve for these people is the level of explicitness about their roles in a future family and their expectations about their life together. It is crucial to establish firm interconnections between children and parents as well as among siblings (American Academy of Child Adolescent Psychiatry, 2011). It seems like Jason is rather protective of this parenting and thinks he knows what’s best for the boys. However, a healthy family has to share responsibilities of parenthood. Figuring out which parenting style to use as a new family is one of the first and most important pieces of advice for new families (Bliss, 1998). While at the beginning there may be some division in parenting Jason and Rose have to make sure they gradually blend the parenting together and bring it to the same level. The children need to learn to listen to both of the parents as well as to the older siblings. One more thing to remember is for Rose and Jason to have time together apart from children as well as for Jason to have time with the boys and for Rose with the girls. And they also have to try to respect and trust every member of the family.
All in all, Rose and Jason did quite a good job in arranging their relationship. What they need to do next is continue with a lot of communication and explanation to the children and assuring them that they will still be able to spend time together. Together with that all of the family, including the parents, has to realize they have to embrace the creation of a new family fully in order to succeed.